Searching For the Impossible

I Need you to make me believe in relationships..... Cause I lost Faith that what it truly means.....

So Here I go again... Haven't Had the opportunity to blog in a while due to the constant stress I've been trying to mentally maneuver through. And Generally Stress Brings on ideas for me. Being that I actually see things (which people don't believe me..) like minority report..

I see big sections of pictures, of Ideas, Fantasies, & art...

So hence the idea for the current tat.. I shy'd away from it because of the normalcy of that tat.. A lot of  dummies just get kiss tattoos because everyone else gets em. But All my tattoo's (except one, drunk night) has meanings, and underlying stories.... So... I had a female in mind who I felt fit the example of what I thought the tattoo meant... But she kinda dodged me after agreeing.. But then... my initial first... Who i was kinda scared to ask.. agreed... SO what does my tattoo... & the topic of this blog mean...

The lips symbolize a woman who I feel is the perfect woman.. The woman who embodies the qualities That I've been searching for my whole life... That Real, honest, cool, funny, down to earth, sweet, beautiful beyond measure, Body that would make a man crash the most expensive car.. Unfortunately she is _______.. The love and pain goes with it being that In a mans life... this is what we chase... From birth.. we chase money & women.. No matter what anyone else makes up.. We do it all for that.. In most cases.. It is entwined with love... lost or gain.. and generally ends in pain...

Which is why I chose her.. She embodies what I've been looking for.. But then you sit back and realize.. their are era's in life.. The raising of women... The things they see, and the things they want to be... Which highly diminishes with each era.. She is from that era , cooks, cleans, loves, respects.. That era is dead... Its numbers became extinct.. She is the defining example of what I can never attain...And as of late.. I lost hope in a sense.. My whole life I've looked for love in that one simple form.. People ask me what do you look for? I say... without flinching or hesitation.. "I just want someone who will Treat me like I treat her"... Simple huh... Now.. After 26 years of getting played, ditched, stood up, told "I'm still in love with my ex" or dumb shit like "your tattoo's are unattractive".. I gave up... I do not believe in relationships of love in my era of life... Finding a woman who is cool, and the above, and doesn't have children.. 0... Not happening.. All I find nowadays is the female whose first questions are.. How big is your dick and how much money do you make? or do you drive? So what does that mean?

I honestly noticed the change mentally.. like.. I use to look at a woman, try to seer into her eyes... Wonder What makes them tick, the true essence of their personality.. and How great it would be to find someone like them.. but now.. I Just glance with the sex mentality.. like.. I feel myself turning into the asshole guy who I never wanted to be.. But why be alone.. others are allowed and condoned to think with their penis.. SO why not indulge my addiction.. yaknow.. cause at this rate... I'll just be sleeping around till' I'm 90.. Cause I'm not gonna settle for someone who disrespects me, cheats, or I'm going to be unhappy with.. I have too many examples that went before me to not step in that pile of bullshit..

So.. My search for the impossible.. Has come to an end... I guess it is the Year of the Asshole/douche bag.. Cause the nice guy kept getting told to drop dead..

And plus I guess the Road to success is a lonely Road.. So... 

Until Then...

~ King.. A lost Breed...